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9.11 The Opening Night Excitation

 

With great fanfare the episode opens with a threat by Sheldon that the guys would never hear the end of it if Sheldon couldn't see Star Wars on opening night. When he finds out this coincides with Amy's birthday he has a moral dilemma and Arthur shows up in his dream to advise him. Sheldon is more concerned with missing Star Wars until Arthur says that he can see the movie any time while he only "has a limited number of days he can be with [Amy.] So be with her." After hearing that comment I admit that my mind jumped to the conclusion that Amy was going to die, but even I know that's probably not gonna happen. Although it WOULD make a heck of a Moment. Maybe George Costanza could give Amy the rest of his wedding invitation envelopes to lick?

As for the whole process of intimacy, I'm glad my life doesn't revolve around Sheldon bedding Amy because if it did I would have been horribly disappointed by the whole thing. The possibility of Sheldon wanting to have sex is supposed to be a big deal and, to be fair, Sheldon realizes that it's an important night for the both of them. But what has me sad is that he never said that he wanted sex. He said, "I'd like to show her how important she is," and he "decided to be physical with my girlfriend" but there was no ringing endorsement that this is something that he wanted to do. It might just be me, but I would be absolutely heartbroken and horrified if I knew my boyfriend was having sex with me just to show me how important I am to him. I want him to be in it because he's 'into' it. Anything else and it makes the whole encounter like a sacrifice than a moment of mutual joy.

Sheldon is worried that he will be overwhelmed and ruin the moment, but to be fair it's Amy's Moment more than his. Granted, Sheldon is placing his own discomfort with physical contact aside so he can be with her is important, but Amy doesn't seem to get how hard this is for him. She bikini waxes and puts candles everywhere and slides over to him on the couch to plant a kiss and get the ball rolling instead of following Sheldon's lead to first go to a restaurant and have a walk. I mean, just pretend for a moment that you care about your boyfriend's mental wellbeing instead of jumping into bed to get your rocks off.

Instead what we get is the biggest understatement in the show's history as Amy says, "I've been waiting for this for so long, I've kind of built it up in my head." Given that bedding Sheldon has been her sole reason for existing as a character since season six I suppose there should be some sort of anticipation.

And yet when the big moment arrives, like almost every Sheldon and Amy moment of intimacy and connection, what happens next occurs off-camera. Their fans have waited four and a half years for a bunch of words on a screen to tell them that Sheldon and Amy had sex. Forget the cigarette, that's not even worth a Nicorette gum.

At the end of it all, Sheldon is surprised that he enjoyed that a lot more than he thought he would, but that kind of endorsement is rather amorphous as he could have thought intercourse with Amy was akin to sticking his penis inside a Sarlacc pit of bacteria. Regardless, it still doesn't motivate him enough to plan future sex any earlier than Amy's next birthday.

The ending was perfect when Arthur asks how it was and Sheldon gushes about the Star Wars movie. After all, a good Star Wars movie has been anticipated for over thirty years by millions of fans and from what the critics say, this one is worth the wait.
 

 

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